You would assume that Thanksgiving would be the perfect template /catalyst for me to write. Well, maybe.
I’m grateful for so many things this year. (1) Mount Rushmore. I have never been. But I’m thankful for it. It’s amazing.
(2) Chicken Pot Pies. They are genius. Dinner + Desert = Pure awesomeness.
(3) Mass Holiday Text messages. Nothing makes me feel more special.
(4) Cabbage.
(5) Amanda [I'm in love] = from Ugly Betty.
(6) Custom ring tones.
(7) Skinny jeans.
(8) Fabric Softener.
(9) Paper Clips.
(10) Wind Farms. A comprehensive solution to our energy crisis.
(11) The 1988 Winter Olympics in Calgary.
(12) Sporks.
(13) Velcro.
(14) The most important of all the file formats, the modest jpeg.
(15) Wild horses.
Not the song made famous by the band Rolling Stones – but rather – Just wild horses.
(16) Caterpillars.
*No explanation needed.
(17) Artificial Satellites.
*Not to be confused with Natural Satellites. Which I’m pretty sure is an absurd term. The English language is so vast that I believe we can cut the term “Natural Satellite” right out of our diction. The moon is a natural satellite, shit – anything NATURAL that orbits a planet or major galaxy is considered a Natural Satellite. But all those things have very specific scientific terms. Important ones actually. So how about we just nix the Natural off of Satellite (in this case) and just keep Artificial in front of Satellite (in this case) (because I think Artificial is an awesome word).
(18) “Three in the key” – Probably one of the greatest basketball violations of all time.
(19) The parking brake.
(20) ink.
(21) The word = Artificial

Before I forget! I need to catch up on my quotes. These are from the last couple of weeks.
“You know what I love about you?
No a god damn thing..:”
Nathan to Duane on a random late night at Tiny lounge
“155 na na na’s in that journey song….”
Jennifer – Expressing how great of an AE she really is. Highly detailed oriented. Maybe a little OCD too.
“IF my gnome steals another one of my crystals, I’m going to punch him in the face.”
Of course….. Michael
“I think there is a line you are crossing somewhere.
I think it’s the hat.”
Phrough to Duane regarding my new fur scarf. [Things are going to get ridiculous this winter.]
“That is how NOT to train a dog.”
Phrough to Duane at random house party.
“So did anyone else see that bag when we walked in here? Is that a red neck barometer?”
Jennifer – Regarding a bag hanging by the front door of a BBQ restaurant that was filled with water and few pennies.
“When I got that Russian tank hat for Christmas……”
Jay
“Did you see the Suns comeback on the Thunder last night? Why don’t you move back to a real state. AZP Baby!”
Thanks Baker – one of the best unexpected text messages of the year.
“Head start Howard…”